9 Things Women Need to Stop Apologizing For

Women tend to apologize…a lot!

But sometimes you just need to stop apologizing and be yourself. Whoever that may be!

I am not immune to this whole apology thing.

I don’t want to stay late/pick up a shift because I have plans. Or I’m just exhausted and hungry. And just worked a 9 hour shift. Or was already over-scheduled that week.  Or I have to go home because my ovarian cysts are currently exploding and I need to lie down with some pain killers. (tmi?)

“Sorry, I can’t.” I mean I do feel bad…but I have a life outside of work! (even if I don’t have kids I DO in fact have responsibilities…but that is a whole different rant!) Plus do you really need to apologize that your body is currently attacking you?

If I can’t keep up with a friend on a run, I apologize. Every single time. Does my friend apologize because she is going too fast? Probably not. So why do I feel the incessant need to say, “sorry?”

Someone isn’t looking where they are walking and they bump into me. 

“Sorry!” I exclaim. This happens all. the. time.

For what? Sorry I was standing there? Am I not allowed to be in a spot in a room where someone might walk? Ridiculous!

Of course it’s good to be polite, but there are some things you just need to stop apologizing for. In that instance, I am going to work on saying, “excuse me.” Is that better? I’m not even sure now, but the thought of not saying anything in response to someone running into me is weird.

I wrote a post for Lifehack on this very subject and it was published recently. I’d like to share a little teaser since I really related to it this week.

 

9 Things Women Need to Stop Apologizing For

Women have the tendency to apologize—for everything. A good example of the constantly apologetic nature is found in the viral YouTube video“Shrinking Women” where Lily Meyers passionately makes a case for why women tend to feel like we need to say sorry all the time. These are some of the things we tend to apologize for, but really need to check ourselves and stop doing.

1. Stop apologizing for your body.

Whether big or small, round or straight, there is no reason to apologize for the way your body is shaped. Women are criticized for bodies that are too large (for “health reasons”) and too small (for “health reasons”). The fact is, we all have a different healthy weight and comfortable size. Your health is determined by your doctor, not someone who can only look at your body from the outside.

2. Stop apologizing for the way your home looks.

Whether off the charts clean or looking like a tornado has gone through the house, do not apologize. If someone is coming into your home, of course you can try to tidy up a bit, but your guest will decide if he/she wants to come back again regardless of your apology. Most often, the person does not even notice the supposed “mess.” (<-gah I’m having flashbacks to when Lee came over and my apartment was an absolute wreck)

3. Stop apologizing for your age.

Whether young or old, women can never seem to be satisfied with their age. When we are young we slather on lipstick, put on high heels in an attempt to look “more grown up.” As we get older, the number of face creams, gym memberships and hair coloring trips increases in order to fool those around us of our age. Why does it matter? Why not embrace where we are in our life and forget about trying to be an age that we are not? (<–this definitely speaks to me this week!)

4. Stop apologizing for having feelings.

Whether you are weepy or overjoyed, it is okay to have feelings. Women typically have a wider range of emotions due to something called hormones that we tend to explain away with being “tired” or “emotional” or having “PMS.” Sure we can try to control these feelings and it is more appropriate to cry in private rather than in public, but when it happens, resist the urge to say sorry for the way you feel. (<-man did I have some “feelings” this past weekend! hormones stink sometimes!)

5. Stop apologizing for your achievements.

Whether we have great achievements or none at all, it really is no one else’s business. Sometimes we feel that if only we had this degree or that career or a husband and a small bunch of cherub-like babes at home we will finally be happy; finally be respected. The thing is, there will always be more to accomplish in life. Be happy with where you are right now and stop keeping that secret tally between you and your friends.

On the other hand, if you do have those tangible successes under your belt, no need to say sorry. You can be proud of what you have accomplished without feeling like you are hurting others. (<-I don’t really apologize..but I always feel the need to justify where I am in life…anyone else there with me?)

See the rest of the 9 Things Women Need to Stop Apologizing For here.

 

Note: of course not ALL women are susceptible to this incessant need to apologize for everything..this is a generalization and was the appointed topic by Lifehack. Feel free to share your opinions if you disagree! 

Another note: I had a very different post planned for my birthday (eek today!) but I decided to go to bed instead and not stress about it today. It’s my birthday! A day to eat chocolate for breakfast (oh wait I already do that), play video games (oh yes), and buy some real clothes (NOT workout clothes…). I will be back later this week with a fun giveaway!

PS It’s my birthday, so check out my post from Saturday all about complete proteins because I worked really hard on it. 🙂

 

Tell me….

Are you a chronic over-apologizer?  Do you think you will ever be able to stop?

Do you have anything to add to the list? (be sure to check the others listed through the link!)

 

Linking up to:

Thinking Out Loud with Amanda at Running with Spoons

 

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